Joke Battles Wikia
IT EVEN WORKS UNDERWATER!

Summary[]

Phil Swift is the spokesman for the Flex Seal family of products. He has an energetic personality and people generally agree that he's very likable.

Phil was born in the heart of a dying star in the Andromeda galaxy during the creation of the Milky Way. The dense elements he was born in gave his titanium-hard muscles. After falling to earth on August 6, 1944, his body completely leveled Hiroshima, Japan just moments before the nuclear bomb was dropped. He fought in Vietnam, earning the nickname "Indestructable Phil" for his 100,000 plus confirmed kills with little more than his bare hands. He is best known for his catchphrase, "That's a lotta damage" after accidentally burning down a Vietnam village in a fit of rage.

While in Vietnam, he created a super-strong adhesive with a mixture of his own celestial blood and tree sap. His invention was widely used to treat severed arteries. Recently, he has begun marketing his invention. He is well known for his ads, in which his PTSD causes him to slaughter buckets and boats by channeling the power of hell. This is why many consider him to be the supreme leader of the universe, with power beyond any humans imagination.

Powers and Stats[]

Tier: 10-A, 9-C with saw | 8-C, Low 2-C with Flex Seal products | High 1-A | 0

Name: Phil Swift

Origin: Flex Seal

Gender: Male

Age: Looks to be in his 30s

Classification: Human, Advertiser

Powers and Abilities: Superhuman Physical Characteristics, Sealing, Fourth-Wall Awareness, Healing, Mind Manipulation, Luck Manipulation, Genius Intelligence, Weapon Mastery (can saw anything in half) | All the previous powers, plus Regeneration (Mid-Godly, far higher with Flex Seal), BFR, Conceptual Manipulation, Time Travel, Immortality (Type 8; reliant on Flex Seal products to live on), Teleportation, Fire Manipulation, Rage Power, can cause a lotta damage, Meme Awareness

Attack Potency: Athlete Level (Can pull a tire up and down with Flex Tape), Streel Level with saw (Can saw a boat in half) | Building Level (Can fix up the Twin Towerscut the Titanic in half), Universe level+ with Flex Seal products (Can saw the universe in half, and presumably bring it back together.) | High Outerverse Level (Killed Logan with the LOGAN PAUL DESTROYER 4000) | Boundless (Has full control over the Flex World, a realm outside normal creation, of which only people who Phil chooses can access it. The entire realm is comprised of indestructible liquid rubber, of which he transcends an infinite amount of times. He has full and total dominion over his realm, and possibly the world outside)

Speed: Peak Human | Hypersonic+, possibly 'Massively FTL+ | Irrelevant | Omnipresent

Lifting Strength: Athletic human | Immeasurable | Irrelevant

Striking Strength: Athlete Class | Building Class, Universal+ using a Flex Tape coated weapon or similar | High Outerverse Class | Boundless

Durability: Peak Human Level | Universe Level+ (Survived the universe collapsing) | High Outerverse Level | Boundless

Stamina: Infinite | Irrelevant

Range: Tens of meters, higher with Flex Tape. | Irrelevant

Standard Equipment: His saw, boats, a cannon, Flex Seal, Flex Glue, Flex Tape, Flex Shot, Winter Wax, Aero Grip Sprayer, Block Out, Maximum Traction, Blast Off, Foamazing!, Slick Fix, Leak Finder

IntelligenceSupergenius (Phil has shown to be able to create technology that is far above what humans can create. His Flex Tape is the most famous, which can repair the universe with ease, and the true Flex Tape is immeasurably stronger. His LOGAN PAUL DESTROYER 4000 was designed to kill the most cancerous godmode on the wiki and succeeded in doing so with ease. Knows exactly how to destroy virtually any structure, and repair it by extension.) | Omniscient

Weaknesses: People buying fake Flex Tape products, anger issues towards inanimate objects, has trouble finding the right shot.

Notable Attacks/Techniques:

  • Flex Seal: Shoots the opponent with Flex Seal and seals them into a cocoon.
  • Flex Tape: Seals them out of existence by slapping it on them.
  • I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF: Saws the foe in half.
  • THAT'S A LOTTA DAMAGE: He does, as the title says, a lot of damage.

Key: Suppressed | Somewhat Serious | Full Power Phillip Swiftopher | Divine Phil Swift 

Others[]

Notable Victories: Logan Paul

Notable Losses:

Inconclusive Matches: