How Not 2 Junk

“	I gotta do stand-up? Mate, I can barely sit down without feeling like I'm over 50... Aight, ya gotta admit that was pretty good.	„
	~ How Not 2 Junk

Summary[]

Junk is just your everyday lad. Average in most every way conceivable, you could imagine his shock when a being from on-high appointed him as it's champion to bring comedy back to all. Or rather, it's 13th champion.

Unbeknownst to Junk, twelve others had come before him, each one trying and failing to achieve the task he has just been given. The news, though devastating that he'd been conscripted to a job he'll likely die trying to complete, gave him the strength he needed to carry on. Well, that and also the literal powers passed on to him by the previous Horsemen. That helped too.

Shortly after his journey began, Junk caught wind of someone gathering heroes to form a team like no other: The Thunderstriders. Believing that, should he join them, he could bring laughter to all, he sought out this someone to join their ranks.

Powers and Stats[]

Tier: 8-B, 8-A with explosives | At least Low 2-C

Name: Junk

Origin: r/DeathBattleMatchups

Gender: Male

Age: 17

Classification: 13th Horseman of The Jester, King of the MarathonVerse

Powers and Abilities:

Martial Arts (Is a black belt in Karate), Explosion Manipulation (via explosive weaponry and Rocket Jump), Fire Manipulation (via incendiary weaponry), Holy Manipulation (via Combusta-Gun), Paper Manipulation (via Ènfoldable), Portal Creation (Can create portals leading to and from the MarathonVerse), Dimensional Travel (Can use the MarathonVerse as a means to travel to other universes), BFR (Anyone inside the MarathonVerse cannot leave unless he allows them to, no matter who or what they are), Berserk Mode (Enters one whenever someone mentions 'Junkrat vs Jinx' in any capacity other than hatred, increasing his stats), Supernatural Luck (via Deus Ex Machina), Empathic Manipulation (via Funny Bone), Pseudo-Flight (via Rocket Jump), Information Analysis (via Analysis), Summoning (via Steel Traps), Friction Manipulation (via Speed Walking), Elasticity (via Rubberhose), Aura and Strength and Speed Reduction (via Pressure), Energy Attraction and Absorption (via Energy Absorber), Sand Manipulation and Homing Attack (via Pocket Sand), Non-Physical Interaction (via Ghost Fighter), Transformation Nullification (via Anti-Super), Resistance to Power Nullification, Existence Erasure, Plot Manipulation, Fate Manipulation, Durability Negation, Illusion Creation, Sensory Manipulation, Quantum Manipulation, etc. (via Deus Ex Machina) and Poison Manipulation (via Bunny Suit)

All base abilities, Energy Manipulation (Can steal kinetic energy from anything, give kinetic energy to anything and shoot kinetic energy blasts), Statistics Amplification (Can charge his physical capabilities with kinetic energy), Regeneration (Mid), Existence Erasure (via Speed-Shake), Fate Manipulation, Plot Manipulation, Conceptual Manipulation and Reality Warping (Can decide what happens to anything in the MarathonVerse, no matter who or what they are), Mind Manipulation (via Hold Up), Vibration Manipulation, Dimensional Manipulation (via Dimension Shift), Memory Erasure (via Brain Wash), Invisibility and Intangibility (via Avoidance), Clairvoyance (via Energy Sense), Resistance to Speed Reduction (Is physically incapable of being slowed or having his speed reduced in any way)

All base abilities, Supernatural Love, Energy Projection (His Star Sapphire Ring can emit blasts of pure love energy), Creation (His Star Sapphire Ring can create constructs, such as barriers and weaponry), Crystal Manipulation and Status Effect Inducement (Using his Star Sapphire Ring, he can crystallise others with the power of love, putting them into suspended animation), Flight, Regeneration (High) and Resurrection (His Star Sapphire Ring allows him to heal and resurrect himself so long as he has enough love inside him), Love Detection and Tethering (His Star Sapphire Ring notifies him of when someone is in danger of losing their love, as well as enable him to tether and pull himself towards them), Love Manipulation (Using his Star Sapphire Ring, he can induce intense feelings of love in others), Resistance to Greed Manipulation (His Star Sapphire Ring grants him immunity to feelings of greed and avarice)

All previous abilities, Higher-Dimensional Existence (Exists in the domain of The Ones Above All), Omnipresence, Lust-Powered Transformation and Energy Projection (via Super Saiyan and Kamehamehorni), Limited Resurrection (Has come back to life on his own on multiple occasions, although this is stated to have a limit. Such limit has never been stated), Reality Warping (Before being one of them, entered the realm of The Ones Above All by tearing a hole in reality... somehow)

Attack Potency: City Block level (Blew up a 1km-long blue whale by punching it), Multi-City Block level with explosives (Completely demolished the Greenland Centre skyscraper), Can bypass conventional durability of unholy beings with Combusta-Gun | At least Universe level+ (Overpowered AU Godzilla, who was strong enough to destroy the AU MarathonVerse in a single stomp), Can bypass conventional durability with MarathonVerse Manipulation

Speed: FTL (Consistently out-ran HAVOC Rifle-fire at point-blank range), Massively FTL+ with Speed Walking, Immeasurable in the MarathonVerse | Immeasurable (The Crown grants him immeasurable travel, combat and reaction speeds)

Lifting Strength: Unknown (Lacks lifting strength feats) | Unknown (Lacks lifting strength feats)

Striking Strength: City Block level | At least Universe level+

Durability: Multi-City Block level (Was standing right next to the explosives that demolished the Greenland Centre), At least City level with Miss Milly (Miss Milly's shield withstood a Tsar Bomba explosion and was left intact) | At least Universe level+ (Took hits from and defeated AU Godzilla, who was strong enough to destroy the AU MarathonVerse in a single stomp)

Stamina: Superhuman | Infinite

Range: Standard Melee Range, Hundreds of Meters with weaponry, Multiversal+ with Crown of the MarathonVerse

Standard Equipment: Miss Milly, Frag Launcher, Rip-Tire, The Motherlode, Combusta-Gun, Ènfoldable, Bunny Suit, Crown of the MarathonVerse

Intelligence: Supergenius (Has a vast knowledge of the multiverse and is an expert on all things related to movement. Is exceedingly creative with his MarathonVerse powers. Is one of the Thunderstriders top strategists)

Weaknesses: Requires the Crown to access the majority of good hax. Without the Crown, is fairly reliant on Deus Ex Machina, which isn't always guaranteed to activate. Weak to holy weapons due to being a ginger. Is a massive sub and will falter fairly easily should he find himself in bondage.

Notable Attacks/Techniques:

Miss Milly: A semi-automatic shotgun disguised as an umbrella. Shoots incendiary rounds and has its shield-like canopy reinforced with laughinium.
Frag Launcher: A firearm that shoots bouncy grenades. Useful for shooting above and around cover at great distances.
Rip-Tire: An explosive tire that is steered and detonated by his thoughts. Can climb walls due to the metal spikes adorning the wheel.
The Motherlode: A mortar cannon that creates rings of fire with its ammunition.
Combusta-Gun: A glock that sets whatever it shoots on fire with holy flames.
Ènfoldable: An infinitely-large piece of laughinium-reinforced paper that is folded an infinite number of times. Can be unfolded and refolded by his mental impulses into any number of things, from impromptu blades and shields to entire traversible fortresses.
Bunny Suit: A bunny suit outfit that protects him from all poisons and toxins.
Deus Ex Machina: His inherent Talent, unlocked by being a Horseman of The Jester. Should he find himself on the receiving end of harm or hax of any form, Deus Ex Machina has a 94.681992% chance of bullshitting a way of him ignoring/surviving it.
Funny Bone: The Talent of the 12th Horseman. He can force whomever he touches to laugh uncontrollably.
Rocket Jump: The Talent of the 11th Horseman. He can create localised explosions beneath his own feet, allowing him to launch himself through the air.
Analysis: The Talent of the 10th Horseman. He can scan any entity, gaining basic information about it's background and abilities.
Steel Traps: The Talent of the 9th Horseman. He can summon sentient bear traps that chase targets.
Speed Walking: The Talent of the 8th Horseman. He can manipulate his own personal friction, as well as the friction of any nearby entities.
Rubberhose: The Talent of the 7th Horseman. He can stretch his body to a ludicrous extent as if he was made of rubber.
Pressure: The Talent of the 6th Horseman. He produces an aura around himself that causes opponents to require doing twice as much effort to perform physical activities, effectively halving strength and speed.
Energy Absorber: The Talent of the 5th Horseman. He attracts and absorbs any and all energies around him, nullifying any additional effects they may have. This absorption does have a limit, which means excess energy isn't capable of being absorbed and instead affects him as it normally would.
Pocket Sand: The Talent of the 4th Horseman. He can shoot sand from his hands that homes in on his target's eyes.
Ghost Fighter: The Talent of the 3rd Horseman. He can touch and harm incorporeal and intangible entities.
Anti-Super: The Talent of the 2nd Horseman. He can lock those he focuses on out of any transformations, immediately reducing the target to their base form.
The MarathonVerse: An entire universe in which characters from across the multiverse come to race, ruled by the one currently wearing the Crown of the MarathonVerse. Whoever rules it can change whatever happens in the MarathonVerse, regardless of who or what is in it. This ability has virtually no limits, though it can fail on those who've shown immense resistance to Fate, Plot, Conceptual and Reality Manipulations.
Crown of the MarathonVerse: A crown designating the current ruler of the MarathonVerse. Grants the ruler unique powers when worn. It's magically bound to him so, should it be destroyed or removed from his person in any way by an external force, it will use one of it's many failsafes to return to his possession. Failsafes include, but aren't limited to: teleporting back to his hand, emitting supersonic blasts, producing deadly diseases, duplicating itself and destroying the original, deteriorating nearby organic matter and transmutating those who touch it to wheels of gouda cheese.
Star Sapphire Ring: A ring powered by his love. Can be used to create constructs of whatever he desires, among other powers.

Kinetic Energy Control: He can control any and all kinetic energy, which includes stealing it from others, bestowing it to others, forming it into energy blasts and enhancing his physical capabilities.. He once used the stealing aspect of this power to take away all of Wally West's kinetic energy in one go.

Speed-Shake: He grabs and shakes an entity so fast that the very concept of that entity starts to tear apart, until it no longer exists in any form of the word.

Hold Up: Slows down his target's thoughts, hindering their ability to register what's happening.

Brain Wash: Vibrates away his target's memories.

Avoidance: By vibrating at high enough speeds, he can turn completely invisible and intangible, unable to be seen or touched by anything.

Energy Sense: Is capable of sensing any and all kinetic energy, even what's generated by other entities. As such, it's incredibly difficult for anything to get the drop on him.

Dimension Shift: Can vibrate at high enough speeds that entities on a higher-dimensional plane of existence are brought to a lesser dimension.

Super Saiyan: A limited-time super form akin to those from Dragon Ball. Is achieved and maintained through excessive horniness, which he naturally has in droves.

Kamehamehorni: A powerful beam of energy akin to the Kamehameha from Dragon Ball. Is powered by excessive horniness. Upon being used, it forces him out of his Super Saiyan Form.

Key: Base | King of the MarathonVerse

Others[]

Notable Victories:

Notable Losses:

Inconclusive Matches: