“ | My girlfriend... Is always rantin' und raving 'bout how cute an' adorable her wee dug is. So I thought I would turn 'im into the least cute thing I could think of: Which is, a Nazi! | „ |
~ Dankula explaining his Nazi Pug joke, the Brit's still didn't get it... |
Summary[]
Count Dankula is a Scottish YouTuber, Ex UKIP Member, and former European Parliament candidate. He received press coverage when he posted a satiric video of a dog he'd taught to raise its paw in the manner of a Nazi salute. Meechan was subsequently arrested and later convicted following a trial of being "grossly offensive" under the Communications Act 2003 in March 2018. This arrest generated controversy and discussions about free speech. In April 2018, Meechan was fined £800. Meechan has since stated he has not and will not pay the £800 fine, instead he donated the £800 to a Glasgow Children's Hospital Charity. Later, he trained another one of his dogs to be a BLM member, got hitched, continued to meme and be meme'd, and runs a series about Absolute Mad Lads (Takes one to know one, right?) He also later became a Supreme Court Justice, joined UKIP for a bit, and is currently a member of The Scottish Libertarian Party... Oh, he also has an heir to his meme kingdom, so the people of the future will fear his wraith...
Powers and Stats[]
Tier: At least High 2-A Physically, Memetic with Powers || Possibly Memetic+...
Name: Markus Meechan, Count Dankula, Daddy Dank, The Nazi Pug Guy, "A Scottish balding neck beard and weapons-grade try hard edge lord." (A loving compliment from his friend AE-Tan.), Countless other names...
Origin: Youtube
Gender: Male, Chuck Norris-sexual in his true form
Age: 31, beyond time and space in true form.
Classification: Prince of Trolls, William Wallace's secret weapon, Libertarian Party Mascot, one of England's Archenemies, Creator of the Pug Reich...
Powers and Abilities: Superhuman Physical Characteristics, Social Influencing, Magic (Learned Magic at Hogwarts), Fourth Wall Breaking, Skilled Hand To Hand Combatant, Reality Warping, Weapon Mastery, Martial Arts, YouTube Manipulation, Spatial Manipulation, Regeneration (Mid, can turn into a floating head, survived getting his head caved in by a giant stick), Demi-God Tier Trolling (Somewhat trolled E;R, Most Leftists, a few Nazis, a couple of Celebrities, and all of England.), Teleportation, Creation (Can create things such as joints from nothing), Smoke Manipulation, Death Manipulation (Can cause Thots to explode by screaming), Statistics Amplification (With his Templar helmet), Duplication, Madness Manipulation, Illusion Creation, Animal Manipulation (Turned his dogs into BLM and Nazi Party Members. Taught his dogs how to speak German, and fight in wars.), Fire Manipulation, Time Manipulation, Vehicular Mastery (Owns a Killdozer), Subjective Reality (Vanilla the Catgirl is his "Conscience Loli", can summon The Illuminati and the American flag. Can change all the colors, textures, and lights around him, can zoom/pan the camera away from him subconsciously, kill people with a thought, and can effortlessly travel anywhere.), Law Manipulation (Became a Supreme Court Justice to troll Twitter), Summoning (Summoned a Level 6 'tism Demon), Text Manipulation, Intangibility, Flight, Sound Manipulation (Can play his theme song anywhere, can increase the volume of his videos), Meme Manipulation, Danmaku (With Unlimited Bait Works), Explosion Manipulation and Radiation Manipulation (Can summon nuclear explosions). Resistance to Cringe Manipulation, Pain Manipulation, Madness Manipulation (Can speak with Chris Chan without dying or going insane), Plot Manipulation (AE-Tan's page talks more about his dog than about him.), and Gay Manipulation (Is immune to "The Ghey"). | All Previous powers but vastly superior, plus Higher Dimensional Existence, Higher Dimensional Manipulation, Plot Manipulation, Empowerment (Grows stronger the more Freedom of Speech and Scottish Patriotism there is around him), Minor Holy Manipulation (With his magical sword), and Fear Manipulation by raising his kilt.
Attack Potency: High Multiverse Level (Can create universal memes. Easily curb-stomped other You Tubers, Stronger than Sargon of Akkad, and Chris Ray Gun.), Memetic with powers (Created the Nazi Pug Meme, among other Memes...) || Memetic+ (Can summon, and is vastly superior to The Illuminati, revealing their secret history involving James Charles just to show them who's boss. Hung out with Alex Jones multiple times...)
Speed: Massively FTL+ Movement/attack speed. Immeasurable with memes. || Immeasurable
Durability: High Multiverse Level (Can shrug off blows from even the deadliest of England's laws.) || Memetic+ (The Illuminati has no hope of ever defeating him.)
Lifting Strength: At Least Class 10 (Could lift two Toyota cars when he was three years old, escaped a choke hold from Alex Jones.) || Universal (Can lift Shia LaBeouf and Kanye West's ego at the same time, with some difficulty...)
Stamina: Extremely High (Got up two seconds after being bashed in the head by a large stick, can make multiple videos a day, almost never tires unless to make a meme...) || Infinite (Can fight England in the final holy war of the apocalypse...)
Range: Multiversal Physically, Far Higher with Powers/Memes. || Outerversal Physically and with Magical Sword.
Standard Equipment: A Gun, his Dogs Buddha and Bronson, Memes, his Templar Helmet, Army Helmet, A Killdozer, and his Magic Sword.
Intelligence: Gifted (Has a vast and extensive knowledge on all of histories greatest Mad Lads and Mad Lasses. Can count how many "genders" there are, despite their supposedly being an infinite number of them. Survived encounters with Simon Mann, Chris Chan, Sargon Of Akkad, and Alex Jones... Somewhat trolled E;R, convinced Nicki Minaj's fans to share pictures of his balls, and is enough of Troll that AE-Tan respects him. Outfoxed and trolled all of Scotland and England and lived to tell about it. Later plans on defeating England itself and reclaiming his honor in the future, but for now stays his hand...)
Weaknesses: Metal Detectors, Steins Gate, The Extinction of Free Speech, people not getting his jokes...
Notable Attacks/Techniques:
His Theme Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcAV5_cZsv0
His Personal Mad Lad Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hH_qirRxZnU
Edgy Boi Alert: "Be careful not to cut yourself on all that fucking edge!"
T.H.O.T.S!!!: It is said that all Thots within 2000 miles suffer a violent stroke when Dank utters this mighty phrase.
Others[]
Notable Victories:
England
Scotland
Stein's Gate (Made fun of it to troll people)
Simon Mann (Got him to appear on his show)
Free Speech Hating Leftists
Free Speech Hating Nazi's
People who hate Free Speech in general
Notable Losses:
New England (For Now...)
Inconclusive Matches:
Sargon of Akkad (is his buddy)
AE-Tan (Has an article about him, but was uncharacteristically kind to him on it (kind by AE-Tan standards anyway))