Joke Battles Wikia

I won't back down. No matter how bloodied or how messed up I am. No matter how bad I look or how weak I am. I will continue fighting until the people of Earth are safe. The people I love are safe. You can strike me down, hell, you could even kill me. But that won't stop me. I will crawl out of hell and drag you back down with me.
~ Birb to the Dark Lord

I may be able to break reality, but I can't outrun the IRS.
~ Birb

Summary[]

Created by God, Birb was sent to Earth as a means of bringing peace to all. Upon birth, he was immediately orphaned when his town was attacked by an alien threat. At age 5, he escaped Colombia to the USA and figured out how to build a spacesuit somehow.

While he was relaxing in space, he was attacked by the same aliens that had destroyed his hometown and had his spacesuit stolen. Realising he was still able to breathe when it was removed, he decided to follow the aliens back to their home planet and systematically annihilated them, vowing to protect those in need of help, no matter the cost. He eventually met up with Tony Stark, who took him under his wing, allowing him access to his catalogue of super-powerful armours. Now, Birb travels the multiverse, combating evil whenever it appears with his team called the Saviors of Time.

Powers and Stats[]

Tier: 7-B, Up to High 6-C | Low 2-C | 2-B

Name: Birbboips

Origin: r/DeathBattleMatchups

Gender: Male

Age: Unknown

Classification: Demigod, Leader of the Saviors of Time

Powers and Abilities:

Self-Sustenance (Type 1; Can breathe in space), Genius Intelligence (Built a spacesuit at age 5. Beat the Devil in Chess), Dimensional Storage (His pockets act as a Hammerspace from which he pulls Random Bullshit. Can steal and put opponents weapons into this Hammerspace), Summoning (Broken beer bottles, Homeless people army, Pidgeons [via Fake Mjolnir], Various Marvel Characters [via Trading Cards]), Holy Manipulation (via Sword of the Heavens), Teleportation, Sound Manipulation (Can make himself sound so annoying he shatters people's eardrums), Flight, Electricity Manipulation, Energy Absorption (via Fake Mjolnir), Reality Warping and Existence Erasure (via Reality Breaker), Vehicular Mastery (Can drive a taco truck well enough to drive to the moon), Time Stop (via Chaos Control) Weapon Summoning (via Chaos Emeralds), Time Travel and Dimensional Travel (via Chronos Control), Soul Manipulation (Can eat souls), Temperature Manipulation and Ice Manipulation (via Freezing Touch), Regeneration (High-Mid), Fire Manipulation (via Fire Breath), Regeneration and Healing Nullification, Air Manipulation (via Wind Blast), Blood Manipulation (via Blood Bending), Psychokinesis, BFR and Death Manipulation (via Negative Zone Glock), Statistics Amplification (via Stim Shots), Resistance to Bullets and Electricity Manipulation (via Combat Suit), BFR and Void Manipulation (Survived and escaped the Shadow Realm, despite no one before him being capable of leaving), Lust Manipulation (Is asexual), Cosmic Radiation and Extreme Cold (via Spacesuit), Mind Control (Broke free from several others with potent mind control), Reality Warping (Could briefly resist some of Archie Sonic's Chaos Magic), Soul Stealing (Has an uncountably infinite number of souls, ensuring he'll never lose all of his soul), Durability Negation

Flight, Energy Projection, Information Analysis, Hacking, Sound Manipulation and Self-Destruction (Standard abilities of any given armour), Electricity Manipulation (Model 7 can emit electromagnetic shocks to mess with electronics. Other Models, namely those stealth-oriented, possess tasers), Magnetism Manipulation (Many Models can generate EMPs), Forcefield Creation (Many Models can generate forcefields), Status Effect Inducement (Model 20 can emit a stunning blast), Magical Energy Absorption, Reflection and Empowerment (Model 22 is powered by an Asgardian crystal, allowing it to absorb, reflect and utilise Asgardian energies, such as the Odin Force. Uru Armour can channel blasts akin to Mjolnir), Explosion Manipulation (Model 29 has explosive micro-munitions it can shoot from its gauntlets), Invisibility (Model 29 and Model 43 can cloak and turn invisible), Surface Scaling via Gravity Manipulation (Model 29 has gravity grips in its gauntlets and boots to cling to surfaces), Time Travel (Model 29 has time travel technology based on the Time Platform), Technology Manipulation (Model 29 can interfere with many forms of technological communication), Illusion Creation (Model 29 and Model 43 have holograms to hide their appearance), Precognition (Model 29 can replicate Peter Parker's Spider-Sense), Density Manipulation (Model 29 can increase its own mass), Non-Physical Interaction (Model 37 can touch intangible beings), Transformation (Model 37 can transform around his body. Model 51 has many different modes, including a Hulkbuster, stealth and samurai forms), Weapon Creation (Model 37 can create weapons out of itself), Homing Attack (Many Models, notably Model 37, can shoot lasers that home-in on targets), Intangibility (Model 39 can become intangible and pass through conventional matter), Ice Manipulation (Model 39 can shoot ice to lock targets in place), Camouflage (Stealth-oriented Models possess camouflaging technology), Vibration Manipulation (Model 51 can vibrate at specific frequencies to hit intangible beings), Radiation Manipulation (Model 51 has a neutrino ray, which shoots sterile neutrinos that emit dark radiation), Energy Absorption Nullification (Model 51 has tainted energy, a special kind of energy that damages energy absorbers), Small Size (Type 3; Model 58's are small enough to enter a human's body), Vehicular Transformation (Model 60 can transform into a Vespa), Energy Weaponry (Model 60 has energy swords), Resistance to Extreme Heat (Model 20 can withstand the heat of a satellite plummeting out of orbit), Hacking (Many armours are equipped with anti-tampering devices), Magnetism Manipulation (Many Models can resist magnetic fields), Telepathy (Model 37 can nullify telepathy as powerful as Xavier's), Energy Projection (Model 58 can permeate ionic energy)

Attack Potency: City level (Kicked a cockroach with the force of 70 megatons of TNT), Up to Large Island level (High-fived God so hard that Earth shook) | Universe level+ (Comparable to Base Form Archie Sonic) | Multiverse level (Fought and easily defeated Githinji, who was able to defeat all of the Saviors of Time at once)

Speed: FTL+ (Ran at 70x the speed of light to get away from a social interaction), Massively FTL+ with Stim Shots (Stim Shots multiply his speed by 100x) | Immeasurable (Kept pace with and eventually outran Archie Sonic) | Immeasurable

Lifting Strength: Unknown (Lacks lifting strength feats) | Immeasurable (Held up the Multiverse when God was on break for 10 years) | Immeasurable

Striking Strength: City level, Up to Large Island level | Universe level+ | Multiverse level

Durability: Large Island level (Survived a high-five from God so strong it shook Earth) | Universe level+ (Took hits from Base Form Archie Sonic) | Multiverse level (Took hits from Githinji)

Stamina: Infinite (Held up the Multiverse when God was on break for 10 years)

Range: Extended Melee Range, Thousands of Kilometers with weaponry and armours, Universal with Reality Warping

Standard Equipment: Random Bullshit, Pistol, Sword of the Heavens, Fake Mjolnir, Combat Suit, Spacesuit, Negative Zone Glock, Stim Shots, Chaos Emeralds, Homeless Guy named Tom, Trading Cards, Various Iron Man Armours

Intelligence: Supergenius (Built a spacesuit at age 5. Beat the Devil in Chess)

Weaknesses: None notable.

Notable Attacks/Techniques:

  • Random Bullshit: His pockets act like a pocket of Hammerspace, allowing him to pull random stuff out and throw them at opponents. Such random stuff includes but isn't limited to: knives, bombs, ketchup packets, blunts, a homeless guy named Tom.
  • Sword of the Heavens: A sword made from the Heavens. Given to him by God, it kills unholy beings.
  • Fake Mjolnir: A fake Mjolnir that is capable of what the original is, albeit to a lesser extent. Can summon magic electricity, absorb energies and grants him flight.
  • Combat Suit: A suit he stole. Completely resistant to bullets and electricity.
  • Spacesuit: A simple spacesuit he made when he was 5.
  • Negative Zone Glock: A glock that sends whoever it shoots to the Negative Zone, a dimension that slowly kills whoever is inside it.
  • Stim Shots: Vials of Stim, a performance enhancing drug. Increases his speed by 100x with every shot.
  • Chaos Emeralds: Physical manifestations of the Chaos Force, taking the form of perfectly hewn emeralds. He is able to utilise them to summon his equipment, most notably his many Iron Man armours.
  • Trading Cards: A pack of trading cards with Marvel heroes and villains on them. He can use them to summon whichever hero or villain is on them, although these summons are significantly weaker compared to their canonical counterparts.
  • Chaos Control: A technique capable of stopping time in a localised space.
  • Chronos Control: A technique capable of allowing him time travel.
  • Blood Bending: He can control the blood in people's bodies. Fine-tuned enough to be capable of bursting blood vessels and causing people to explode through too high a blood pressure.
  • Reality Breaker: A technique where he breaks reality and erases his target from existence.

  • Model 7 (Stealth Armour): A stealth-oriented armour. Equipped with electromagnetic pulses and camouflage technology. Overshadowed by other stealth-oriented armours.
  • Model CE1 (Prometheum Armour): A fairly standard-issue armour, equipped with all the Iron Man staples. Good and reliable.
  • Model 20 (Tin Man Armour): A relatively average armour, primarily used for extreme environments. Capable of withstanding extreme heat and can emit electric shocks that can stun crowds of people.
  • Model 22 (Thorbuster Armour): An armour powered by an Asgardian crystal, made to combat Thor. Can use the crystal to absorb and access Asgardian magics and energies, such as the Odin Force.
  • Model 25 (Iron Secretary): A pretty standard, run-of-the-mill armour. Despite having access to potent zero-point energies, doesn't possess too much unique equipment to stand out against other armours.
  • Model 29 (Extremis Armour): An incredibly useful armour. Possesses explosive micro-munitions, invisibility technologies, time travel technologies and a replicated Spider-Sense.
  • Model 37 (Bleeding Edge): Another fairly standard armour with some unique capabilities. Can touch and harm intangible beings, transform around his body into a multitude of weapons and is one of the more notable examples of armours equipped with homing lasers.
  • Model 37 (Iron Destroyer/Uru Armour): A modified version of Bleeding Edge combined with magical Asgardian ore, Uru. Has access to Asgardian magics and can shoot blasts of electricity similar to Mjolnir.
  • Model 39 (Ghost-Tech Armour): An armour equipped with ghost-tech, allowing it to become intangible and phase through conventional matter. Also has access to ice blasts that freeze targets and make them immobile.
  • Model 43 (Stealth Armour MK 3): An improved version of Model 7. Superior in every way to Model 7, with additional access to cloaking and hologram technology to further enhance its stealth capabilities.
  • Model 51 (Model Prime Armour): Arguably the most versatile armour. Has many different modes, including a Hulkbuster form that increases physical strength, samurai form complete with a samurai sword and a stealth mode. Can vibrate at specific frequencies to hit intangible beings, shoot sterile neutrinos that emit a dark radiation and tainted energy that nullifies energy absorbers.
  • Model 56 (Unlimited Armour): An armour created after Tony Stark founded Stark Unlimited. Fairly standard, with the only unique capability being it firing micro-pods that contain swarms of Model 58s which can be remotely controlled.
  • Model 58 (Nano Armour): Microscopic armours that are small enough to enter a human body to mess with a target's insides. Usually come in swarms of thousands and are capable of permeating through ionic energy.
  • Model 60 (Vespa Armour): A standard armour that can transform into a Vespa. The handlebars can be used as energy swords.
  • Model 63 (Godbuster Armour): His strongest armour to date, made in the eScape. Capable of combating the likes of Archie Sonic, who can effortlessly move at immeasurable speeds and destroy entire multiverses.

  • Key: Base and Other Armours | Model 63 Armour | Rage Mode